Stepmemo

A note to stepmoms everywhere

If Momma Ain’t Happy…

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I was reading a book today, and it said something important and profound at the same time; “The properly situated family has marriage at the center; families shouldn’t revolve around children”. Now the joy of the stepmom situation is that there’s a lot of insecurity and worry there. The children worry that there’s an attempt to replace their mother, the husband worries that the wife will not want to shoulder the burden of his family, and well, a stepmom has enough to worry about. Sometimes the father automatically doesn’t trust his wife to have his children’s best interest at heart. When problems arise he is quick to defend his child, often undermining any authority his wife has. Authority is something that’s complicated in these situations anyways, so being undermined in front of the child you are supposed to take care of is pretty insulting. Guys, seriously, don’t do it. The problem with taking the child’s side, assuming the child is right or putting the child first is this: children don’t often know what’s right. They don’t know what it takes to run a house, they don’t know why things are done a certain way, and they don’t know how to take care of themselves or anyone else. They do know how to do things selfishly and get out of control if you give them control. You got married because you love that person and want to spend the rest of your life with them. Remember that; the child will grow up and move out, you will still be living together. If you have a healthy marriage, you are modeling something positive for them to grow up with and you will both be happy. If you two are happy with each other, it’s that much easier to make sure everyone else is happy. Trust and put each other first and remember…

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Author: Jessie Henry

Reinventing my life and enjoying my adventure. Living life as full as I like with no apologies, loving all of it.

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