Stepmemo

A note to stepmoms everywhere


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Sunday Gut Check. (Not Probiotics)

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Courtesy girl-heroes.com. i think more of us agree with this than will admit!

Sometimes, it’s ugly. Sometimes you look at the big pile of yuck before you and it’s like a wave. Like a never ending wave of garbage, gross, messy garbage. It will pile up and seem to tower over you.
And you will have more than one of these garbage towers in your life, probably more than one a year.
The easiest thing to do with this giant steaming pile is to look upon it with fear. You do that and it all owns you; the obstacles, the bills, the emotional issues, the everyday stream of stuff to do will all no longer be yours. You will be theirs. You will have lost the upper hand in the situation.
Sometimes, when it’s real ugly, like hurricane Katrina ugly, you can’t even look.
Sometimes you have to just keep your head down, do one thing at a time and just keep chugging along, knowing you are doing your best. And in spite of whatever garbage spills from the mouths of those around you, that is all you can ever do.
Don’t look up, just know you are doing your best and keep reminding yourself that you got this.
You’ve been through worse.

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Find Yourself, Be Great

Today I realized something. It was a pretty great epiphany, and at first it’s going to sound a little strange, so stay with me for a minute.  People are reverse engineered.  We are backwards from everything we create.  Most things, like a car for example, have an input, serve a purpose and have an exhaust.  For a car, you give it gas, it gets you somewhere, and it puts out fumes as its exhaust. People don’t have a standard input, they work or take care of families (serve a purpose) and, if they have time, they will spend time with friends or have a hobby (believe me, it’s much needed exhaust). Our exhaust is our “venting” to people, or creating something we love. We NEED it. If we don’t have an exhaust, our input gets out of whack. We drink more, smoke more, eat more, sleep more, watch more tv, we are stressed!  If you don’t do something you love, it all feels pointless. You feel empty, lost, wondering what you should do. From the moment I wake up in the morning my family comes first. Make breakfast for my husband (aww, how sweet) take care of the dog, get the kids to school. After work, it’s my family again; pick up the kids, discuss their day CAREFULLY (help them with their problems without making them as sarcastic as I am – not sure it’s working) make dinner and clean something (ugh). It’s my purpose as a wife to serve my family, but that doesn’t mean that’s everything. I need to make something. I love to draw, I love to paint, I love to write. Sometimes I sew or cook something extravagant. Life is too short not to have some form of exhaust, you HAVE to do something. If you do nothing but care for everyone else all day, every day, you will lose yourself. Meet with friends or create something you love, just for you. It won’t matter if no one else likes it, you will love it and it will give you a sense of accomplishment and pride. I promise! It’s not going to be easy to find time, but I can’t tell you how important it is to who you are as a HUMAN BEING.

But I will tell you one thing, the answer is not shopping. Seriously.